Over 70 pages of hilarious Viz Top Tips
Sam1927 Wales Regular ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 1 Sep 2017 Messages 253 Reaction score 173 Reactions 173 Credits 10,000 14 Sep 2017 #1 Over 70 pages of hilarious Viz Top Tips Last edited by a moderator: 1 Oct 2020
The Colonel Gaffer ⭐ PLATINUM VIP ⭐ ⚽ MODERATOR ⚽ 👌👌👌 1000 PAGER 👌👌👌 ⁛ FOURCAST WINNER ⁛ ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ ❼ WHITTINGHAM ❼ $ BANK $ Joined 26 Aug 2017 Messages 83,268 Reaction score 145,612 Reactions 148,910 Country Credits 10,960 14 Sep 2017 #2 PRETEND to be a GIANT lion tamer by hitting your cat in the face with a chair from a doll's house.
Cantonend Wales Regular ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 28 Aug 2017 Messages 441 Reaction score 350 Reactions 388 Credits 10,020 14 Sep 2017 #3 CONVINCE people you're Tom Cruise by jumping off your neighbours roof and then limping away sheepishly.
CONVINCE people you're Tom Cruise by jumping off your neighbours roof and then limping away sheepishly.
Cantonend Wales Regular ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 28 Aug 2017 Messages 441 Reaction score 350 Reactions 388 Credits 10,020 14 Sep 2017 #4 TV PRESENTERS. You won't see me after the break. That's not how television works.
Jonesy Wales Call Up ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 20 Aug 2017 Messages 309 Reaction score 205 Reactions 209 Credits 10,000 14 Sep 2017 #5 RECREATE a New York deli experience by eating a stale bap with a hole poked through it and declaring it "supoib".
RECREATE a New York deli experience by eating a stale bap with a hole poked through it and declaring it "supoib".
Jonesy Wales Call Up ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 20 Aug 2017 Messages 309 Reaction score 205 Reactions 209 Credits 10,000 14 Sep 2017 #6 SAUSAGES are a delicious alternative to vegetarian sausages.
The Colonel Gaffer ⭐ PLATINUM VIP ⭐ ⚽ MODERATOR ⚽ 👌👌👌 1000 PAGER 👌👌👌 ⁛ FOURCAST WINNER ⁛ ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ ❼ WHITTINGHAM ❼ $ BANK $ Joined 26 Aug 2017 Messages 83,268 Reaction score 145,612 Reactions 148,910 Country Credits 10,960 14 Sep 2017 #7 footballers - have your name and number tattooed on your back in case there's a colour clash and you need to play in skins.
footballers - have your name and number tattooed on your back in case there's a colour clash and you need to play in skins.
Sam1927 Wales Regular ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 1 Sep 2017 Messages 253 Reaction score 173 Reactions 173 Credits 10,000 15 Sep 2017 #8 TRICK people into thinking that you've been to the gym by being boring, hungry & sweaty.
The Colonel Gaffer ⭐ PLATINUM VIP ⭐ ⚽ MODERATOR ⚽ 👌👌👌 1000 PAGER 👌👌👌 ⁛ FOURCAST WINNER ⁛ ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ ❼ WHITTINGHAM ❼ $ BANK $ Joined 26 Aug 2017 Messages 83,268 Reaction score 145,612 Reactions 148,910 Country Credits 10,960 16 Sep 2017 #9 GET the experience of speaking to Neanderthal man without the hassle of time travel by placing an ad on Gumtree.
GET the experience of speaking to Neanderthal man without the hassle of time travel by placing an ad on Gumtree.
Slug ***Top 10 poster*** ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ PICKEM 17/18 - 2nd Place 🏁🏁🏁 50 PAGER 🏁🏁🏁 Joined 28 Aug 2017 Messages 23,977 Reaction score 33,862 Reactions 36,495 Country Credits 10,010 16 Sep 2017 #10 Shoplifters ... walk backwards into shops, so if you get caught by security, when the cctv footage is rewound , you can prove you already left shop before crime was committed
Shoplifters ... walk backwards into shops, so if you get caught by security, when the cctv footage is rewound , you can prove you already left shop before crime was committed
Jonesy Wales Call Up ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 20 Aug 2017 Messages 309 Reaction score 205 Reactions 209 Credits 10,000 18 Sep 2017 #11 ALWAYS keep a hammer next to your wireless in case a DJ says "Next up, Mumford and Sons".
Sam1927 Wales Regular ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 1 Sep 2017 Messages 253 Reaction score 173 Reactions 173 Credits 10,000 18 Sep 2017 #12
The Colonel Gaffer ⭐ PLATINUM VIP ⭐ ⚽ MODERATOR ⚽ 👌👌👌 1000 PAGER 👌👌👌 ⁛ FOURCAST WINNER ⁛ ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ ❼ WHITTINGHAM ❼ $ BANK $ Joined 26 Aug 2017 Messages 83,268 Reaction score 145,612 Reactions 148,910 Country Credits 10,960 19 Sep 2017 #13 PARENTS. Encourage your kids to swear by getting a shih-tzu or a fucking labrador.
Cantonend Wales Regular ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 28 Aug 2017 Messages 441 Reaction score 350 Reactions 388 Credits 10,020 20 Sep 2017 #14 FOOTBALLERS. Embark on a scintillating run of goalscoring form by simply having me take you out of my Fantasy Football team.
FOOTBALLERS. Embark on a scintillating run of goalscoring form by simply having me take you out of my Fantasy Football team.
Mrs Steve R Ballon d'Or Winner ⭐ PLATINUM VIP ⭐ 🏆 GOLD VIP 🏆 🗐🗐🗐🗐 200 PAGER 🗐🗐🗐🗐 ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ ❼ WHITTINGHAM ❼ I ❤ NG WEED CLUB 🍺 BEER CLUB 🍺 🔟 PICKEM 10/10 🔟 Joined 27 Aug 2017 Messages 27,913 Reaction score 51,827 Reactions 52,571 Country Credits 10,020 20 Sep 2017 #15
Steve R Ballon d'Or Winner 🏆 GOLD VIP 🏆 ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ 🗐🗐🗐 30 PAGER 🗐🗐🗐 ❼ WHITTINGHAM ❼ I ❤ NG WEED CLUB 🍺 BEER CLUB 🍺 Joined 28 Aug 2017 Messages 16,632 Reaction score 43,095 Reactions 43,952 Credits 10,140 20 Sep 2017 #16 Cantonend said: TV PRESENTERS. You won't see me after the break. That's not how television works. Click to view full quote
Cantonend said: TV PRESENTERS. You won't see me after the break. That's not how television works. Click to view full quote
Cantonend Wales Regular ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 28 Aug 2017 Messages 441 Reaction score 350 Reactions 388 Credits 10,020 20 Sep 2017 #17 For anyone worried about their GCSE results, remember that it's too late to stop climate change & most of you will die fighting for water.
For anyone worried about their GCSE results, remember that it's too late to stop climate change & most of you will die fighting for water.
The Colonel Gaffer ⭐ PLATINUM VIP ⭐ ⚽ MODERATOR ⚽ 👌👌👌 1000 PAGER 👌👌👌 ⁛ FOURCAST WINNER ⁛ ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ ❼ WHITTINGHAM ❼ $ BANK $ Joined 26 Aug 2017 Messages 83,268 Reaction score 145,612 Reactions 148,910 Country Credits 10,960 21 Sep 2017 #18 TRICK every person you meet in to thinking that you are a website by obnoxiously insisting that they accept your cookies
TRICK every person you meet in to thinking that you are a website by obnoxiously insisting that they accept your cookies
Sam1927 Wales Regular ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ Joined 1 Sep 2017 Messages 253 Reaction score 173 Reactions 173 Credits 10,000 22 Sep 2017 #19 CONVINCE people you're a New Zealander by protesting that you sound nothing like an Australian in an Australian accent.
CONVINCE people you're a New Zealander by protesting that you sound nothing like an Australian in an Australian accent.
The Colonel Gaffer ⭐ PLATINUM VIP ⭐ ⚽ MODERATOR ⚽ 👌👌👌 1000 PAGER 👌👌👌 ⁛ FOURCAST WINNER ⁛ ❺ 5 YEARS ❺ ❼ WHITTINGHAM ❼ $ BANK $ Joined 26 Aug 2017 Messages 83,268 Reaction score 145,612 Reactions 148,910 Country Credits 10,960 22 Sep 2017 #20 Discourage jugglers from visiting you by only having one of everything.